Of Pranks and Homophobia
by Allons-y Rosie
Summary: RLSB slash! Peter adores Remus and Sirius. But he's homophobic. What happens when they play a prank on him pretending to be gay? Will it evolve into true love? Find out! R&R please!
1. Discovering the Prank

**A/N: Ok. This is my first attempt at writing a slash fic. I may be great at it and I may suck at it. Tell I suck and I will discontinue the story and continue to read slashes and not butcher them. Please don't tell me I suck! So anyway, here goes!**

_Summary:__ Peter adores Remus, and Sirius. He is also homophobic. What happens when they decide to play a prank on him about their sexual preferences? Takes place in 6__th__ year marauders era. _

_Disclaimer:__ I do not own any of these characters except for the ones I make up. If I do happen to somehow make money off of this it goes to J.K.R. _

_WARNING:__ THIS IS A SLASH! IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT THEN DON'T READ IT AND THEN FLAME ME! _

It was a sunny day on the Hogwarts grounds and almost every student was out by the lake watching the giant squid make little splashes with its tentacles. It was the kind of day that would have made anyone want to stretch out under a tree and drift lazily off to sleep.

The Marauders however were in the deserted great hall putting permanent sticking charms to dung bombs then placing them on the bottom of Snape's chair. It was a brilliant plan, really. James had thought it up while practicing permanent sticking charms in charms class. It was May in their sixth year and they hadn't been the cause of any mischief since the end of March. That was saying a lot for the Marauders.

Peter was standing at the entrance of the Great Hall, in case anyone came. Remus was sitting on a chair, reading a book and pretending not to notice what his friends were doing. James was putting the sticking charm on the dung bombs while Sirius was handing him the dung bombs. It was the picture of absolute teamwork really. Well, except for Remus that is, but technically he was doing a good job of not reporting them to McGonagall.

Peter looked around nervously. It had been almost five minutes and no one had come. Peter narrowed his small eyes and opened the door to the great hall and looked out. He was starting to get suspicious.

Sirius poked James in the arm, noticing Peter's lack of attention on them. They shared a look that said "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Sirius gave James a wolfish grin and slunk away from the dung bombs, crawling on all fours. Remus looked up from his book and gave Sirius a very prefect-like look. Sirius just smirked at him and continued with his plan of scaring the crap out of Peter.

Peter was still searching for anyone coming through the door, when he felt something huge land on his back. He fell forward with a loud "OOMPH" and raucous laughter from the one other boy and the dog that was currently in the process of turning back into a boy. Remus shook his head, grinned, and offered Peter his hand to help him back up.

"Can't you two just concentrate on the prank and not on jumping me," asked Peter rubbing his head.

"Peter actually does have a point, guys," Remus said while heaving Peter up from the floor. James was still howling with laughter. He glasses were askew as he wiped tears from his eyes. He applauded and gave Sirius a standing ovation.

Sirius grinned sheepishly. "Come on Moony. The whole handing James the bombs thing was starting to get boring. And besides, your book reading was getting old". Remus sighed and looked at James; who was attaching the last dung bomb to the bottom of the chair.

"Can't wait till dinner tonight," the bespeckled boy said with a snicker. Sirius rubbed his hands together maliciously and threw his head back with an evil laugh and started creeping towards Peter.

"Yes," he said putting on a voice that sounded like the crypt keeper. "For when Dear Snivelly comes down to eat his fill there will be a stench awaiting that abnormally long nose of his". He then grabbed Peter by the neck and put him into a headlock. James cocked his head thoughtfully.

"You know Sirius; you do touch Peter an awful lot. If I didn't know any better, I would think that you're in love with him," said James. Sirius looked scandalized and opened his mouth to retort when he had a sudden thought. He smirked, put one hand on his hip and developed a limp wrist.

"Oh James! You Sherlock Holmes you! You've found me out, except for the fact that I love Peter. That was wrong. I am madly in love with Remus J. Lupin," He ran over to Remus and gave him a back-breaking hug. Peter look frightened. James was doubled over in laughter, and Remus was trying to pry Sirius off of him while Sirius was declaring his undying love and devotion to his lupine friend.

"Oh Remus, ever since the first day I met you I've had a fiery passion for you that was ever threatening to burn through my pants. Take me you beautiful creature you! Take me!"

James was now dying of laughter and Peter was still rooted to the ground; his mouth open in shock. Remus had finally managed to pry Sirius off of him and was also doubled over in laughter. He pointed an accusing finger at Sirius.

"You all saw it! I was just butt-raped by a member of the crazy and most homo house of Black!"

Now it was Sirius' turn to laugh. He placed a dramatic hand over his head. "Woe is me! My love will not return my affection! I have no more reason to live!" He stabbed himself with an imaginary knife and fell to the floor in a dramatic death scene. Remus knelt down beside him.

"Who says I didn't enjoy the butt-raping?" Sirius opened one eye. "Say what?"

"You heard me"

Sirius leaped up and took Remus by the arm. "Finally; my lust grows every second I'm not ravishing you! Come! Let me take advantage of you in the boys' dormitory" They started to exit the great hall with their arms around each others' waist. That is until:

"STOP!"

The three boys turned around to face Peter. He looked pale and shaky.

"You two aren't gay!"

Sirius and Remus looked at each other quizzically until Remus decided to speak for the both of them.

"Of course we're not Peter. We were just playing around. Besides, why would you care so much?" He asked folding his arms. Peter shuffled his feet and looked down.

"Because that's just disgusting and I really don't want to poofs for friends"

Sirius looked a little angry. "Peter, are you saying that if we were, well…gay you wouldn't be friends with us anymore?"

"Well Yeah! That is really disgusting! I couldn't have the whole school know that you like each other like that,"

James spoke up and patted his friend on the back. "But Peter, you already are the laughing stock of the whole school," he said in what was supposed to be a caring manner.

"Well you don't have to worry about it anyway because we're not,' said Sirius.

Peter shrugged. "Alright; as long as it was only a joke".

James rubbed his hands together. "Good, now that that's settled I'd say we go out and enjoy what's left of this beautiful day," and he started for the door. Peter followed.

Remus started to follow but Sirius grabbed the back of his shirt.

"Not going to rape me again are you, Sirius. Because I'm saving it for marriage, thanks"

Sirius shook his head, looking exasperated.

"No, but I've thought of a nice little trick to pull on Messrs. Wormtail and Prongs".

"Do tell, my boy do tell".

"Well, first of all, are you okay with pretending to go out with a bloke?"

Remus thought for a while then: "Yes".

"Good because we're going to see just how loyal Jamsie and Peter are when they think we're going out".

Remus stared at Sirius. "That is bloody brilliant! They'll never suspect a thing. When do we put this plan into action?"

"Tomorrow sound good?"

Remus nodded. Peter appeared at the door. "Guys, come on. James has Snivelly hanging by his trousers again".

The two boys looked at each other and followed the small boy out onto the grounds.


	2. Setting the Prank into Action

**A/N: You like me! You really like me! Ok, I'm done now. Yay! I'm soooo happy that you guys liked the story so I thought I'd do a quick update! So here you go!**

Remus woke up early the next morning at the request of Sirius. It was about 6 AM and he was tired. It had been a full moon a couple of nights ago and he was still feeling the effects of the sleepless nights. He sighed and started to get dressed before he met Sirius in the common room.

When he came downstairs, he saw Sirius sitting on one of the chairs with a frustrated expression on his face. Sirius looked up, smiled, and patted the spot on the couch next to him. Remus rolled his eyes at his friend's enthusiasm and sat down next to him.

"Now, how shall we go about this," he said curiously. Sirius perked up.

"Well, I've already given that quite a bit of thought, and so far it all depends on how far you're willing to go with this".

"Wait, why does it 'all depend on how far _I'm_ willing to go' with this?" Remus asked a little offended. Sirius sighed and gave his friend a patronizing little pat on the back.

"Remus, Remus, Remus," he said shaking his head. "You know _I'm_ fine with any kind of physical erm…attention. I'm just worried about how you'll feel about it".

Remus gave him a disbelieving look and laughed. Sirius furrowed his brow, confused at how the boy was reacting. Remus, however, kept laughing.

Sirius looked at the boy worriedly.

"Remus," he asked. "Are you okay?"

Laughter.

"Er, Remus?"

More laughter.

"Oh come on now Remy, this isn't funny anymore!" the boy exclaimed, clearly a little frightened at his friend's strange behavior. Remus sat up and wiped the tears from his eyes.

"Sirius do you really think that I'm not afraid of public affection? Especially with you?"

Sirius opened his mouth to retort but then thought about the statement his friend had just made, and shrugged.

"You know Remy, you really surprise me sometimes".

Remus raised an eyebrow. "Really? How so."

"Well I would've thought that you're one of the straightest people in the world so….," he trailed off uncertainly. Remus just shook his head.

"Whatever Sirius; let's just get back to the plan," he said exasperated.

Sirius nodded and decided to get back to work.

By the time Peter and James had woken up they had all the kinks worked out of their plan and were prepared to put it into action.

It was going to be one eventful afternoon.

**A/N: I KNOW I KNOW! I LEFT IT AT A CLIFFHANGER! Sorry but my Mom's bf was being a meany so I have to get off! (give me reviews saying what a jerk he is and maybe that'll spur me on to write again soon (hinthint)).**

**Love the reviews! And I love you! Thanks! **


	3. Pranks and time limited snogs

**A/N: Hello again! Thanks so much for all the reviews guys! They've really been motivating and crap like that. I love you all for them! So here's the first day of the prank. I hope you enjoy!**

Remus and Sirius stood outside the next day. They had woken up late that day so they could make a grand entrance.

They waited outside the doors. Why they were waiting, neither of them knew but they waited nonetheless.

"Nervous, Moony?"

"…"

"Moony?"

"Not, not really. Just thinking"

"Well, shall we then?" asked Sirius, offering Remus his hand. Remus looked at his friend's hand for a moment with a look of trepidation on his face; then, hesitantly, he took it.

Sirius mentally breathed a sigh of relief when Remus took his hand. For a second, he wasn't sure if he actually would.

Sirius looked at Remus and smiled encouragingly. Remus smiled and pushed open the doors to the Great Hall with his free hand.

They walked into the Great Hall still holding hands, walked over to the Gryffindor table and, and sat down in front of their friends. James looked at them over his glasses and gave them both a quizzical look. Peter was too busy stuffing his pudgy face to noticed his friends' new found form of affection. James elbowed Peter in the ribs and Peter looked up at Remus and Sirius.

James cleared his throat importantly.

"May I ask what's going on here?" he asked his friends. Sirius cocked his head to the side and gave James a look that seemed to say "Oh this? We do this all the time".

Peter started to laugh. The Marauders turned to look at him questioningly.

"Peter", Remus asked. "Are you feeling alright?"

Peter just shook his head.

"I already know what you two are doing", he said with an air of superiority that would've made a Slytherin proud. The two boys shared a worried look at turned back to Peter.

"You're playing a prank on me about my homophobia".

Sirius looked stunned ay how quick with these things Peter was becoming, but quickly recovered.

"Actually no, Peter. You see, Remus and I have had feelings for each for some time now and today we finally decided to come out and tell our best friends because we know that they'd accept us no matter what", Sirius finished this with looks of utter bewilderment from James and Peter. Remus, however, was trying very hard to stifle a laugh.

Peter still looked unconvinced. He folded his arms across his chest and leaned back in his chair.

"I still don't believe you two".

Remus sighed.

"Peter, what _will _we have to do to show you that we really do love each other" he said exasperated.

James got an evil look in his eyes and grinned mischievously.

"In order to show us that you two love each other…you have to kiss".

Sirius shrugged and kissed Remus on the cheek. They always kissed on the cheek when they were joking around so it wasn't uncomfortable for either of them.

"There, see? We love each other".

James shook his head.

"You have to kiss on the lips".

"For ten seconds," Peter piped up. Sirius turned his head to ask Remus about it but the small blonde boy had already captured Sirius' lips on his. This caught Sirius by surprise but he soon got over the shock and started to run his fingers through Remus' gray streaked hair. Sirius probed his tongue over Remus' bottom lip and opened his mouth to let Sirius' tongue enter. Remus placed his hands on the back of Sirius' neck and pulled him in to make the kiss deeper.

It was a good thing that the hallway almost empty or everyone would be staring at the snog taking place. Remus and Sirius barely heard James telling them that their 10 seconds was up. They broke from the kiss and looked at each other; panting. Peter was staring at wide eyed and open mouthed at the two of them and James was looking like he was about to have a heart attack or burst out laughing at any moment. Sirius and Remus just grinned at each other.

Sirius smiled roguishly at James and Peter.

"So how long was _that_?"

"25 seconds".

The two pranksters looked at each other. They got their book bags and headed to class with their arms around each others' waist.


	4. The Prank's end

**A/N: Hello all! Sorry for not updating in a while but I've been very busy with school and other academic crap like that. Oh, and be happy for me because I'm going to Baltimore with my Dad tomorrow (my mom's bf is keeping his fat ass at his house! YAY!). So anyway, I won't talk much more. Oh, almost forgot; thanks for the reviews!!! I love you all soooo much for it! Keep it up and I promise that it won't take me too long to update again! I'm sorry in advance that this is so short but whatever. Love you all! **

Sirius and Remus walked down the hall to charms class hand in hand. The day had been fun so far what with scaring the bejeezis out of James and Peter (but mostly Peter :P). They walked down the corridor for a while, not really minding the fact that the whole school now thought that they were gay. Remus looked up all of a sudden.

"Rat and stag at," he looked at his watch, "1 o'clock". Sirius, thinking quickly, pushed Remus up against the wall and started to move in to kiss him but stopped as if he had just noticed James and Peter walking towards him.

"Oh, sorry guys didn't see you there". Remus let out an accidental laugh and pulled Sirius into a nearby broom closet to cover it up. Sirius gave Remus a puzzled look as the small blonde boy put his ear against the door. He paused; then:

"Ok, I think they're gone"

He smiled at Sirius and sat down against the wall. Sirius smiled back and copied his friend. He looked at him with a worried expression.

"So I noticed that there's a full moon coming up".

Remus looked at Sirius with a weary look on his face. Then he started to talk.

Sirius wasn't sure when he had stopped listening but he remembered when he started to look at Remus in a whole new way.

The raven haired boy looked at Remus as his lips moved and the way he used his hands when he talked passionately about something. He was actually a little surprised that Remus hadn't noticed that he was basically just staring at him. Before he even knew what he was doing he leaned forward and kissed his sandy haired friend passionately on the lips. He wasn't even sure if Remus was kissing back but he didn't care. He was kissing with utter abandon and a desperation that he didn't even know was there. It was a little while before he realized that Remus was kissing him back and with the same kind of abandon and desperation. Sirius ran his hands through Remus' hair and pulled him closer.

If anyone had walked in on this particular broom closet they probably would've seen two boys that were completely and totally in love with each other. However this did not happen.

The two boys finally broke apart and looked at each other. Remus gave Sirius a confused look and took his hand. Sirius smiled, pushed the door open, and took his lupine friend around the waist and pulled him close.

"Moony"

"Yeah?"

"Can we please skip charms class, just this once?"

"."

"Well?"

"Okay"

Sirius pulled his friend into a chaste kiss and grabbed his hand. They made off at a run towards the Hogwarts grounds.

They collapsed, panting and laughing under a willow tree.

"That was fun," Sirius said trying to blow the bangs out of his eyes. Remus nodded and moved the bangs out of Sirius' face. He turned away but Sirius grabbed his wrist and pulled him into another kiss.

"I guess the prank's turned into reality," Remus said as he sat down and drew his knees up. Sirius nodded and they watched the giant squid make bubbles on the lake. Their fingers entwined in the others', they didn't care about the school, or their homophobic friends; they just knew that they were together and that's all they had and needed.


	5. Those Days

**A/N: Hey guys! Just a quick update for y'all. Sorry that it's been taking so long to update but I've had a lot of writers block so it's been hard. I actually came up with this while listening to the Little Women soundtrack (I know, I'm a Broadway nerd you don't have to tell me). So I apologize in advance for the shortness and not-all-that-greatness of this fic. **

Sirius woke up the next day feeling tired and sore from spending the whole day cramped in broom closets with a certain were-wolf. He smiled at the thought of him and huddled closer under the covers. He sighed contentedly and put his arm over the empty space next to him. Except it wasn't empty.

Sirius froze and hastily tried to remember what he did last night.

"_Let's see… I snogged, took a shower, snogged, got changed, snogged some more, and went to bed."_ He didn't remember sleeping with anyone. Sirius took a deep breath and turned around.

"Good morning sleepy head," said Remus cheerily. Sirius gave a relieved sigh. He knew that if he had slept with Remus he would've remembered it. However, he had to make sure.

"Remus"

"Yes"

"You're in my bed"

"I know"

"_Why _are you in my bed?"

Remus gasped theatrically "Why Sirius, you don't remember!?"

"Erm…no"

"You don't remember that we snogged until our lips were numb?"

"That part I remember"

"What part don't you remember?'

"Oh. I don't know, MAYBE THE PART WHERE YOUR SHIRTLESS AND IN MY BED!"

Remus started to laugh. Sirius looked at his friend; sure that he had finally lost his mind.

He looked at his friend with a bemused expression on his face.

"Nice one Rem. But next time try to prank me so that I _don't_ die of a heart attack"

"Sure thing, Pads"

"Great. Now how about we get dressed and go down stairs to get some breakfast".

"Sure". Remus jumped off the bed and started to get dressed. That is, until he felt someone's eyes on him. He turned around to find Sirius still lying on the bed watching him change. Remus rolled his eyes and made a shooing gesture with his hands. Sirius grumbled but got up nonetheless and walked down stairs, but not before blowing his new boyfriend a kiss.

Remus rolled his eyes again and continued to get dressed. This was going to be one of those days.

"Those days" were usually the ones where Sirius was extra hyper and reckless.

"Those days" were his favorite.

**A/N: I know! It was way too short! I promise that the next one will be longer. Thanks again for all the reviews. They are the heart and soul of this story. Love ya!**


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